Every. Single. Day.

I tried. I really, really tried.

I recently decided – just because I like to decide things – that I was going to be a bourbon drinker. There seems to be something rather sophisticated about drinking a nice bourbon at the end of the day, and a lot of people whose opinion I value told me that there’s nothing like a really great bourbon. So I did some research and decided to get Woodford Reserve, which is known as one of the great bourbons.

Mother of God, I couldn’t take it. I’ve had bourbon before, and I remembered why I didn’t like it years ago. It’s the type of drink – if you’re not someone who already knows and enjoys bourbon – that actually forces you to make a face, wince, and shiver. If I was a cartoon cat, my eyes would have exploded out of my head. When I have a drink – whether it’s bourbon, gin, wine, tea, or Diet Pepsi – I want to enjoy the taste. This is something I just can’t enjoy (though I can see how drinking it can get you to the state you want to be in and warm your soul rather quickly).

This isn’t a knock on Woodford Reserve. I’m sure it’s a fine bourbon, and if you like bourbon you’ll love it. But I found out that I don’t like bourbon. Or should I say I remembered that I don’t like bourbon. The smell brought back instant memories, not good memories, and the taste was something that just…sigh.

The way I described it on Twitter was “caramel vinegar mixed with pure fire.” And I think that’s an accurate description. I’m sticking with gin and tonics.

Happy New Year, by the way. Christmas was fine and New Year’s Eve was quiet. I don’t believe people who say they don’t make resolutions. Even if you don’t formally sit down and think to yourself, “OK, in 2012, I resolve to…,” you’re going to make plans for the new year. It’s a natural thing to look back and plan for the future when we get to the holidays and the end of the year. It’s not even something you can escape even if you wanted to, and I truly believe no one really wants to, even if they like to say they’re a person who thinks that resolutions are stupid.

So I have some resolutions. I won’t bore you with any of them, except for one that indirectly affects you: I’m going to update this site or Professor Barnhardt’s Journal every single day. That’s right. Every. Single. Day. I’ve made that declaration before, and I failed miserably, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t keep trying. Hope springs eternal, etc.

I think I can do it, though check back on January 2 to see if I’m succeeding. Or as Charlie Sheen would have said in 2011, “Winning!”

Boy, am I glad 2011 is over.