Pillsbury Doughboy Hurt In Freak Bake-Off Accident

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) The Pillsbury Doughboy was hurt earlier today in a fire during the annual Pillsbury Bake-Off at the Hilton Hotel.

Mr. Doughboy, in town for personal appearances to promote his book, They Knead Me More Than I Need Them, was burned over 90% of his body after a contestant’s “Pigs In A Blanket” recipe suddenly exploded. Doughboy was rushed to Cedars Sinai Hospital, where doctors said that, although Doughboy sustained injuries over a large portion of his body, the injuries were more of the nice, toasty variety, and filled the emergency room with the smell of freshly baked bread.

“To tell you the truth, at first I thought it was kinda sick, and then I remembered, hey, it smells just like grandma’s house,” said Dr. Andrew Lassiter, who treated Doughboy for his injuries.

“The hardest part was trying to use the stethoscope to listen to his chest. He kept giggling all the time. But I took that as a good sign he wasn’t severely injured,” Dr. Lassiter said.

Pillsbury spokesperson Mindy Cramer said that the browning that Doughboy experienced actually fits in with their new marketing plan, which is to turn the Doughboy more brown to appeal to an international audience.

“We spent so much money on make up and make up artists to give him just the right touch of brown to make him look different but not turn off longtime fans. Now, as bad as this accident was, it looks more natural and will save us a ton of money,” Cramer said.

Doughboy will spend a few days in the hospital for observation, but is expected to make a full recovery.

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