Flavorful Meat

I got nothing today. There are some days where you just have nothing to say, really. What should I write about? That I had a few cups of chai? That I watched a little TV? That I wrote today? That I read a bunch of stuff online? That I paid a bill? That I opened the refrigerator and noticed I need more Diet Pepsi? Yes, I did all these things, but I don’t want to write about any of them today.

I will talk about the supermarket though. The place I go to (or one of them, since we have three big chains in town and none of them seem to have everything I want so I find myself going to a couple of them several times a week) put up some new signs out front several months ago. There are some signs that are predictable and logical, the kind of words and phrases you expect to see outside of a supermarket: “Fresh Bakery,” “Welcome,” Fresh-Picked Produce,” etc. And then there’s this one:

“Flavorful Meat.”

It’s baffling. Of all the ways you could describe the meat you sell, you choose “flavorful?” If you did want to discuss the meat you have for sale, shouldn’t you say something about the freshness of the meat, or that fact that it’s from grass-fed cows or that it’s the finest meat in the world, blessed by the Pope and escorted to the store via a crack security detail?

No, instead the store goes with the phrase “flavorful meat.” Honestly, if I’m buying food in your store I’m just going to assume it has flavor.

I’m really curious as to what words were rejected in favor of “flavorful.” “Fantastic?” “Meaty?” “Joyous?” “Finger-Lickin?”

Well, at least it has given some of the locals an idea for their band name.

Have a great weekend!

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